Friday, June 18, 2010

Bedside Stay

Today was just one of those days - the ones where I am barely conscious during it. My chest pain backed off last night, as did my racing heart. But all the muscles on the right side of my body tightened, from my toes to my head. The headaches from those "left/right" episodes are unbelievable. So, needless to say, I was kept to my bed all day. Moving only makes everything worse. *long sigh* But since I got some relief on the referral pain, there is no need to call Dr. Fetters. It's an unhappy truth that this kind of episode and headache combination is a common occurrence that I have become "used to". It is also one of these episodes that usually sparks the 2 week+ long headaches. It's even taking a lot out of me to sit here and type this update. I have to rest my left arm on one of my legs to keep my weight off my right side. My balance is also affected when my inner ear pulses with pain. It's quite an odd feeling, akin to an ear-ache, but "connected" to every other twinge in my body. Unique, but not pleasant at all.

Thing is, I am not in any way unhappy, upset, snippy, or short with people. I'm in one of those understanding moods, actually. Another blessing, at least for my family. *chuckle* As soon as I woke up for the umpteenth time this evening, I could hear Michael watching Godzilla with my dad, my sister watching Dr. Who, and came out to see my brother working on a small building project.
Then, mum and dad came to see how I was doing...with mum's voice heavily laced with concern. She takes my illness really hard, but is great with the external showing of it. I don't know what I would do without her. She is amazing.

I won't have much to report on today, just because of the fact that I have been bedridden. But I can vouch for God's unending mercies and love. It is often during these times that I am most contemplative, and most calm. I feel closer to him when I'm lying as still as possible, wincing every few seconds as the pain courses in waves through my body, and praying. I even manage a contented smile between the grimaces.
God is good.
All the time.

I won't end with my customary "Be Well", right now. So I'll end with this: Please be vigilant in your walk with Christ. He can get you through the hardest of times and make sure you carry good memories away from it.
He's that good to us.

Loving Him,
-Rae

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