Thursday, August 18, 2011

Booyah!! =D

Well here I am!
It's again been SOOOO long, I know. But I am seriously back into the writing mood. I have a couple short stories and a novel started, and am fleshing out the scenes in my novel. I am watching period dramas, reading period fiction, and some voyager fanfic. My star trek geekdom obsession has resurfaced, tho Star Trek: Voyager has claimed my heart at this point =P yes, laugh. But I am content with being the amusing trekkie, since I love it so much *chuckle* I'm also talking with friends more, went shopping Tuesday night with Molly, have two tickets to take her to a movie, have just enjoyed a wonderful 2 hours talking and sipping tea at Starbucks with Casey, and am now sitting at my beloved Flowing Well Park, typing this out on my Droid 2, and am smiling like a fiend because I am happy.
Just happy.
I love life!
My sister and I are best friends, and are having a sleepover soon. I saw my bestie Casey, my friend Leah just got married to one of the most enjoyable and sweet guys I've ever met, Dusty Redden, my friend Kim is getting married to the fun blondie Adam Jansen, Casey is getting closer with herr beau Carl, Molly is on good terms with her boy Johnny, Beka is engaged to Adam Hostetter, Amber is engaged to the sweet guy Chris Roberts....this is the year of love, I think! =P *chuckle*
Oh, and I have two young men currently IN LOVE with me, Caleb and Blake. Blake lives in Iowa, and is a cello and computer programming major, as well as one of my best friends, and the first guy I've ever trusted completely (esp after my experience with my 'father'). And Caleb is a Audio production (or so) major, the kind of guy who makes sure the sound, sound effects, vocals, music, and so on are perfect and high quality for music, music videos, and movies. Caleb goes to my church, altho goes to school at Ball State, two hours away. But while I talk to Blake almost every day, and talk to caleb often, I get to SEE Caleb. He took me on one official date, to the Maccaroni Grill, then to see Bad Teacher. During dinner, the movie, and after, we laughed so hard and long and for so many hours that even by the end of our two hour dinner, my cheeks hurts =P haha. He and I have lots of fun together, and can both make each other laugh. He's not as emotionally attentive as Blake tho, but Blake can also make me laugh, and Caleb can also pick up on cues. So, overall, they're both great, christian, fun guys. And they love me for me, and both want to see me in their future. And they're both working on self improvement just because I enetered their lives....and both have said to me, 'Even if this never works out on a romantic level, I want our friendship to always be there, no matter what. And I want you to know that you have been one of the most if not the most impactful person in my life, and I love you all the more for it!" *melts* ....*bounces and grins* My mom says that boys need to confess they love me far more often, cause the day after both guys confessed their love (within an hour and a half of each other on the same freakin night! O.o I KNOOOW! haha), I told mum about them, and she says I was glowing. The boost to my self esteem, to have 3 guys, all my best friends (Daniel, Blake, Caleb), fall head over heels in love with me and start planning 'our future', from the ages of 13 to 19. *grinning* That plus being asked out by a lesbian friend of mine has made me feel pretty awesome haha. Talk about flattering!! ^.^ *squeaks* I'm Happy! =D
Blake is saving up money and taking up a second symphony job just to be able to come down just after Christmas and to spend a week or so here in Indy with me, take me out on dates, walk in a park with me, and so on.
Cause you see, I haven't made a final decision as to who I am going to date. So mum and I are going to drive up to Iowa so she can meet Blake and I can sit in person with him for the first time. You see, we met online, on a GAME no less (, an internet 'Halo' offshoot), and then picked up from there. And yes, i've made sure he's no creeper XD.
But I will not pick out a guy that is not approved by my mum, esp since I am happily estranged from my dad, and want to show my mum that I very much want to respect her, and since she loves me and wants what is best for me, and always has, I will entrust this to her discretion, as she might see more than I will about the guy, since I might be too close to the subject to make a smart decision. But I have been very straightforward about my wishes, my personality, my expectations, and that I am not in love with either of them, tho I am willing to give it a go if my mum and God approve, and give me the nudge to enter into the relationship. See, I don't want to mess with a guy, lead him to think I am more interested or engaged than I truly am, and to make sure that the friendship is always strong, no matter what else does or does not happen.

Now that you've been updated on the generals of my newly widened 'Love Life', I will do a brief medical update. I have stopped IV therapy, since they had to pull my pick line due to the infection and hospitalization a few weeks ago. I've sadly been worse since then. My new doctor Dr. Mimms is amazing, and i'm very hopeful, esp since he's knowledgable, a christian, and the prescriber of my pain meds *laugh and a wink*.
we're still waiting for my genetics test to come back, and otherwise, are just trying a couple new pain meds, and trying to keep me from getting worse too fast. But the doctors are pretty worried that my body is Soooo damaged that it won't or even CAN'T accept outside help. If they can't fix me, 20 or 30 years will be shaved off my life at the very least, if not die before my 30th birthday, and all the years in between like right now, and worse. Not my ideal life, I assure you. But God knows best, and I still wouldn't trade these years of trials and learning for anything. I have grown so much and learned so much patience and hope and understanding other people's plights that I am excited for the prospects ahead of me!

I have a few job possibilities, with tutoring, and possibly being an art teacher. I have wanted to start an art class for a while, and could possibly take over the art class that I grew up in, and that taught me to appreciate, love, and grow in art. =D My teacher, Ms. Rew, the most positively infliential person in my entire life, can't teach the class this year. And she says i'm the only one she wants or trusts to take over her favorite class, and that i'd be perfect for the job. I probably can't do it, at least this semester, due to my health. But it's def started me thinking. I LOOOVE teaching, writing, OR Art. But I have 4+ potential tutoring students, so, i'm hoping that pans out, and more if possible. Cause at least it's something i'm good at =P
I really want to pick up my music again, but while I was at my friend Abi's house, I played piano for night on 20 minutes straight without a break and making it up as I went, and it reminded me why I love music so much and went to State with it, but also reminded me why I don't play any more. My hands and back hurt like heck just from those 20 mins. =( So sad....*sniff* oh well.

I'm working on digital art now, and will have to post my first ever drawing in photoshop for ya'll. Your comments would be very welcome! A second piece is only a few hours away from completion. But my computer is frelled up and screwed, so it will have to be a while. But I saved up enough to buy a tablet to hook up to my laptop so I can use a pen to digitally draw with, when I get a comp that can support it =P *chuckle*

....all in all, I have been happy, busy, despite being so sick (you should see me as 'busy' when i'm happy, healthy and active =P I love it, but most people can't keep up with me *laugh*), and have been doing a lot, esp creatively.
I want to meet with a few more friends before they go off to college again, and I am on fire for all my writing and art pursuits.
So, I have lots of fodder for the next hundred or so posts (XD), and I hope can entertain you, as well as show you how God has been making my life so happy in spite of and because of everything going on in my life. So stop by and say hi! Rae is BACK, and with a vengence!
Bring it on!

-Rae <3 Read more "Booyah!! =D..."
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